PLEASE NOTE
Sister Jim
(The following is a serious subject and we don't want any snickering or the making of rude noises. We have asked Sister Jim to watch over this web page and report any offenders to the appropriate officials. Just know with technology the way it is today, we will know who you are. If you are mature and can handle the serious nature of the following subject then you have nothing to worry about. Just remember Sister Jim is watching.
Thank you. I.M.P)
Thank you. I.M.P)
FLATULENCE
I think most scientists, whether they be Creationists, Evolutionists or believers in Intelligent Designers, will agree that the world started in a gaseous state before it took form. Even today, humans and other mammal-like beings still retain remnants of that gaseous state. You don't believe us. It is present in our farts.
Now some people might be offended by the term "fart." That's why we called this page "FLATULENCE" in an effort to sound a little more sophisticated (almost sounds like a French word, don't it?) and scientific but we all know what we are talking about ---passing gas.
Now some people might be offended by the term "fart." That's why we called this page "FLATULENCE" in an effort to sound a little more sophisticated (almost sounds like a French word, don't it?) and scientific but we all know what we are talking about ---passing gas.
THE REVELATION
Several years ago I was travelling around the country, looking for answers to questions that had troubled Mankind for centuries. Is or was there a Unohu? What proof is there that Unohu exists? Suddenly, I had a revelation...
Okay, before I tell you my revelation, I want to say that we all have our revelations in different ways --- some people see Unohu in unusual places like on a piece of toast or on a dog's behind. We all know that Unohu works in mysterious ways. That being said, my revelation wasn't so much what I saw but what I didn't see.
My revelation was that Unohu, in His infinite wisdom, made farts invisible. Can you imagine what the world would be like if we could see these gaseous assaults on our senses as they were created and entered our world. What colors would they be? Would the color indicate the severity of the odor?
Okay, before I tell you my revelation, I want to say that we all have our revelations in different ways --- some people see Unohu in unusual places like on a piece of toast or on a dog's behind. We all know that Unohu works in mysterious ways. That being said, my revelation wasn't so much what I saw but what I didn't see.
My revelation was that Unohu, in His infinite wisdom, made farts invisible. Can you imagine what the world would be like if we could see these gaseous assaults on our senses as they were created and entered our world. What colors would they be? Would the color indicate the severity of the odor?
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John Dillinger
Isn't it obvious what John Dillinger is smiling about? Come on, you don't smile like that unless you've just cut the cheese.
THANK UNOHU THEY ARE INVISIBLE
No more blaming the guy next to you on the elevator.
Now we don't know how scientific this all is but it is an observation and we all know that observation is one of the keys to good science.
For Breezy