RECIPE for
ADAM AND EVE
Thanks to the Creation Museum Theory that Adam and Eve co-existed with dinosaurs (and we all know that scientists study dinosaurs) we can now look at Adam and Eve from a purely scientific viewpoint rather than a Biblical one. (That’s really cool. F.B.B)
First things first.
WAS ADAM REALLY MADE FROM DUST?
According to the Creation Museum, Unohu made the first man, Adam, from dust. That’s a lot of dust. For those in the know, we’re not going to get into the whole Creation 1.0 vs. Creation 2.0 versions in Genesis. We’ll leave that mess to the Biblical scholars.
(Were you aware that the next Adam might be hiding under your bed. If you don’t believe us go look for yourself --- we’ll wait --- no really, go look and come back and tell us what you found.)
(we’re still waiting)
(would you please go and look under your bed so we can get on with this WEB SITE)
(thank you)
(Were we right? Did you find some dust bunnies under your bed? Well, there you go. Who knows when the Big “G” or the Intelligent Designer or Unohu might blow a little life up those nostrils. And don’t you dare clean up those dust bunnies --- you might be aborting the next generation of Adams. But more about that later.)
We decided to test the claim that we didn’t evolve from ape-like creatures (like those evolutionists claim) but that we are, in fact, basically walking, talking mud pies or dust bunnies.
We wanted to know how to make a living, breathing human being out of dust.
Since the Creation Museum is a little sketchy in this area, we decided to check out the Internet to see if there is a recipe or guide. The Internet has everything, right? Not this time.
We decided to look and see what makes up the human body. The first thing that came to mind was the following Mother Goose Nursery Rhyme.
First things first.
WAS ADAM REALLY MADE FROM DUST?
According to the Creation Museum, Unohu made the first man, Adam, from dust. That’s a lot of dust. For those in the know, we’re not going to get into the whole Creation 1.0 vs. Creation 2.0 versions in Genesis. We’ll leave that mess to the Biblical scholars.
(Were you aware that the next Adam might be hiding under your bed. If you don’t believe us go look for yourself --- we’ll wait --- no really, go look and come back and tell us what you found.)
(we’re still waiting)
(would you please go and look under your bed so we can get on with this WEB SITE)
(thank you)
(Were we right? Did you find some dust bunnies under your bed? Well, there you go. Who knows when the Big “G” or the Intelligent Designer or Unohu might blow a little life up those nostrils. And don’t you dare clean up those dust bunnies --- you might be aborting the next generation of Adams. But more about that later.)
We decided to test the claim that we didn’t evolve from ape-like creatures (like those evolutionists claim) but that we are, in fact, basically walking, talking mud pies or dust bunnies.
We wanted to know how to make a living, breathing human being out of dust.
Since the Creation Museum is a little sketchy in this area, we decided to check out the Internet to see if there is a recipe or guide. The Internet has everything, right? Not this time.
We decided to look and see what makes up the human body. The first thing that came to mind was the following Mother Goose Nursery Rhyme.
"What are Little Boys Made of Poem"
What are little boys made of?
Snips and snails, and puppy dogs tails
That's what little boys are made of !"
What are little girls made of?
"Sugar and spice and everything thing nice
That's what little girls are made of!"
We couldn’t imagine why a sweet old woman would lie about such a thing but we were unable to find any evidence to back up her claims so being scientific we checked out another web site.
According to the following web site http://www.boston.com/globe/search/stories/health/how_and_why/011298.htm
“An average adult body is 50 to 65 percent water -- that's roughly 45 quarts. Men are more watery than women.
A man's body is 60 to 65 percent water, compared to 50 to 60 percent for a woman.
In infants, the figure is a whopping 70 percent according to statistics compiled by the International Bottled Water Association.”
According to another web site: http://www.sumeria.net/oxy/o3.html
“Percentage of water making up tissues, organs, fluids and bone in the human body:
Brain 75%, Heart 75%, Lungs 86%, Muscle 75%, Liver 85%, Kidney 83%, Bone 22%, Blood 83%, Saliva 95%, Perspiration 95%”
That’s a lot of water. Yet, the Creation Museum doesn’t mention this fact or address the issue.
Have you ever tried to sculpt something out of clay or dust? It ain’t easy. Think you could sculpt something as tiny as a blood corpuscle out of dirt? If our blood cells are made out of dust, dirt or something like clay why don’t they dissolve in our blood stream which is 83% water. How can dust hold all our water inside?
It appears that the theory like the dust itself doesn’t seem to hold water.
(The Intelligent Designer or Unohu can do anything He damn well pleases. F.B.B.)
(Try not to swear, this might be a textbook someday. I.M.P.)
(Sorry. F.B.B.)
All that water sounds more like soup than mud. What kind of soup, one may ask?
Hmmmm, Hmmmmmm Good
Have you ever tried to sculpt an ant? How big is the Intelligent Designer or Unohu ? He must have really good eyes.
GENESIS - THE SIDEBAR - ADAM AND THE MUD PIE THEORY
We can imagine a conversation between Unohu and Adam where Unohu tries to explain to Adam where he came from. How do you explain DNA to a guy that doesn’t even know what pockets are? Double helix? Forget about it.
Unohu: You are made up of tiny DNA…
ADAM: What’s DNA?
Unohu: Deoxyribonucleic acid
ADAM: Huh?
Unohu: It’s kind of like little, tiny blocks of information…
ADAM: What are blocks?
Unohu: They are what you build things out of.
ADAM: What are they made of?
Unohu: Mud, they are made of mud and…
ADAM: I’m made of mud?
Unohu: NO! (to Himself) This is not going to be easy.
(Author’s note: If you ever heard the expression “ dumb as dirt” there is s good chance it was first used to describe Adam.)
ADAM: Are you saying I’m like a walking, talking mud pie?
Unohu: No, I made you from the dust of the ground and then breathed into your nostrils the breath of life and you became a living being.
ADAM: What you’re telling me then is that I’m a living breathing dust bunny?
Unohu: What? You want me to tell you and those that follow you that Mankind evolved from some primordial ooze millions and millions of years ago and over time and lots of trial and error eventually became Man.
ADAM: You mean my choices are some kind of acid, dust, mud or ooze. Next thing you know you’re going to tell me I arrived by stork.
Unohu: I knew it. You’re not ready for the truth.
ADAM: Wait. You said “those that follow?” I thought I was the only one. I thought I was special.
Unohu: You are but there will be others. And some of them will be women.
ADAM: Is that good?
Unohu: That’s something you will have to decide for yourself.
ADAM: But I thought you knew everything.
Unohu: There are some things in the universe that are even a mystery to me.
ADAM: That’s it?
Unohu: Then you’ll start begetting.
ADAM: What‘s begetting?
Unohu: Where do I begin, my son? You better sit down, this is going to take a while…
(We want to make sure we get this next part right so we are going to quote from the Bible. I.M.P)
According to Genesis 2:21-23 “And the LORD God caused
a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept;
and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place.
Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man
He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.
And Adam said:
‘This is now bone of my bones
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.’”
ADAM: Whoa! Wait a minute. Slow down. Can you go over the part about the ribs again? You did what?
This whole “rib thing” really confuses us too. Does anyone remember anything from high school biology about any other animals reproducing in this way. Maybe an amoeba but that was a single celled animal. We think everyone would agree that human beings aren’t single celled. Kind of sounds like cloning.
We’re not quite sure how the begetting process went from rib cloning to sex. We don’t see the connection. Is this the same process Unohu used for creating the other animals? If Eve came from Adam’s rib shouldn’t she have the same DNA as Adam? If this is true, and we are all the descendents of Adam and Eve, shouldn’t all of Mankind have the same DNA?
Confusing ain't it?
Let us, dear reader, forget about HOW Adam and Eve were made for the time being. Let us concentrate at what they might of looked like. We figure these paintings (see below) were done a long time ago. Closer to when Adam and Eve really lived so the artists had a better idea of what Adam and Eve looked like, Right?
GENESIS - THE SIDEBAR - ADAM AND THE MUD PIE THEORY
We can imagine a conversation between Unohu and Adam where Unohu tries to explain to Adam where he came from. How do you explain DNA to a guy that doesn’t even know what pockets are? Double helix? Forget about it.
Unohu: You are made up of tiny DNA…
ADAM: What’s DNA?
Unohu: Deoxyribonucleic acid
ADAM: Huh?
Unohu: It’s kind of like little, tiny blocks of information…
ADAM: What are blocks?
Unohu: They are what you build things out of.
ADAM: What are they made of?
Unohu: Mud, they are made of mud and…
ADAM: I’m made of mud?
Unohu: NO! (to Himself) This is not going to be easy.
(Author’s note: If you ever heard the expression “ dumb as dirt” there is s good chance it was first used to describe Adam.)
ADAM: Are you saying I’m like a walking, talking mud pie?
Unohu: No, I made you from the dust of the ground and then breathed into your nostrils the breath of life and you became a living being.
ADAM: What you’re telling me then is that I’m a living breathing dust bunny?
Unohu: What? You want me to tell you and those that follow you that Mankind evolved from some primordial ooze millions and millions of years ago and over time and lots of trial and error eventually became Man.
ADAM: You mean my choices are some kind of acid, dust, mud or ooze. Next thing you know you’re going to tell me I arrived by stork.
Unohu: I knew it. You’re not ready for the truth.
ADAM: Wait. You said “those that follow?” I thought I was the only one. I thought I was special.
Unohu: You are but there will be others. And some of them will be women.
ADAM: Is that good?
Unohu: That’s something you will have to decide for yourself.
ADAM: But I thought you knew everything.
Unohu: There are some things in the universe that are even a mystery to me.
ADAM: That’s it?
Unohu: Then you’ll start begetting.
ADAM: What‘s begetting?
Unohu: Where do I begin, my son? You better sit down, this is going to take a while…
(We want to make sure we get this next part right so we are going to quote from the Bible. I.M.P)
According to Genesis 2:21-23 “And the LORD God caused
a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept;
and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place.
Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man
He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.
And Adam said:
‘This is now bone of my bones
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.’”
ADAM: Whoa! Wait a minute. Slow down. Can you go over the part about the ribs again? You did what?
This whole “rib thing” really confuses us too. Does anyone remember anything from high school biology about any other animals reproducing in this way. Maybe an amoeba but that was a single celled animal. We think everyone would agree that human beings aren’t single celled. Kind of sounds like cloning.
We’re not quite sure how the begetting process went from rib cloning to sex. We don’t see the connection. Is this the same process Unohu used for creating the other animals? If Eve came from Adam’s rib shouldn’t she have the same DNA as Adam? If this is true, and we are all the descendents of Adam and Eve, shouldn’t all of Mankind have the same DNA?
Confusing ain't it?
Let us, dear reader, forget about HOW Adam and Eve were made for the time being. Let us concentrate at what they might of looked like. We figure these paintings (see below) were done a long time ago. Closer to when Adam and Eve really lived so the artists had a better idea of what Adam and Eve looked like, Right?
Okay first things first. If we are going to look at Adam and Eve from a scientific point of view, we gotta ask --- What's with the belly buttons? The Creation Museum is claiming that Unohu created Adam from dust and Eve from Adam's rib. They never had umbilical cords. Why would they have belly buttons? Why would Unohu give them belly buttons? It doesn't make sense. Belly Buttons? Really?
And what's with the foliage covering the naughtly parts. This was before they sinned so they had no reason to be ashamed. Was it some sort of fungal infection? The Sistene Chapel doesn't have foliage covering the naughty bits.
And what's with the foliage covering the naughtly parts. This was before they sinned so they had no reason to be ashamed. Was it some sort of fungal infection? The Sistene Chapel doesn't have foliage covering the naughty bits.
|
CONVERSATIONS WITH ADAM
Years later, Adam tried to explain things to Cain and answer questions like: CAIN: How come there aren’t any other kids to play with? ADAM: Just wait. CAIN: Where did we come from? ADAM: You are made up of tiny DNA… CAIN: What’s DNA? ADAM: I don’t know. It’s some word I can’t remember or pronounce. CAIN: Huh? ADAM: It’s kind of like little, tiny blocks of information… CAIN: What are blocks? ADAM: They are what you build things out of. CAIN: What are they made of? ADAM: Mud, they are made of mud and… CAIN: I’m made of mud? ADAM: No, I was made from mud. You were begat. CAIN: What’s begat? ADAM: Go ask your mother. |
EDEN GONE WILDDid you notice that Eve is topless in all the paintings?
Where these paintings of Eden kind of like a GIRLS GONE WILD video of today?     The Creation Museum never talks about this.
To order your GIRLS GONE WILD DVDS go to: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Ddvd&field-keywords=girls+gone+wild |
What did Adam and Eve really look like?
'middle-brown skin colour?'
AIG web site asks:
“Was Adam Brown-Skinned?
We can’t say for sure, but I suspect Adam had a middle-brown skin colour. All humans have the same skin colour. We have a pigment called melanin. If we have a lot of this pigment we are very dark (even black). If we don’t have much of this pigment we are very fair (white).
In The Answers Book, it is explained that from two people having the right mix of dominant and recessive genes for the amount of melanin, all shades of colour in humans could arise. Thus, if Adam and Eve were both a middle-brown colour, all shades from black through to white could be accounted for in their children and future generations. For the same reason, Adam and Eve probably had brown eyes and dark hair.
In a similar sort of way, if Adam had blood group ‘A’, and Eve had blood group ‘B’, all of the ‘ABO’ blood groups (A, AS, B. O) could arise.”
______________________________________________________________________
Did you notice that suspicious word in the first sentence?
"We can’t say for sure, but I suspect Adam had a middle-brown skin colour."
According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary
Suspect: to imagine something to be true or likely
Just because you “suspect” something doesn’t make it true. We "suspect" that AIG and the Creation Museum are making this stuff up. And what’s all this talk about blood and “In a similar sort of way” what the hell is that suppose to mean? If Eve was made from Adam’s rib, like the Creation Museum is claiming then Adam and Eve would have the same DNA and the same blood type.
The Creation Museum portray Adam and Eve as having black hair and nice tans --- but they aren’t what one could call “middle-brown skin colour.”
Yet the Sistine Chapel at the Vatican shows them with light colored or red hair?
“Was Adam Brown-Skinned?
We can’t say for sure, but I suspect Adam had a middle-brown skin colour. All humans have the same skin colour. We have a pigment called melanin. If we have a lot of this pigment we are very dark (even black). If we don’t have much of this pigment we are very fair (white).
In The Answers Book, it is explained that from two people having the right mix of dominant and recessive genes for the amount of melanin, all shades of colour in humans could arise. Thus, if Adam and Eve were both a middle-brown colour, all shades from black through to white could be accounted for in their children and future generations. For the same reason, Adam and Eve probably had brown eyes and dark hair.
In a similar sort of way, if Adam had blood group ‘A’, and Eve had blood group ‘B’, all of the ‘ABO’ blood groups (A, AS, B. O) could arise.”
______________________________________________________________________
Did you notice that suspicious word in the first sentence?
"We can’t say for sure, but I suspect Adam had a middle-brown skin colour."
According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary
Suspect: to imagine something to be true or likely
Just because you “suspect” something doesn’t make it true. We "suspect" that AIG and the Creation Museum are making this stuff up. And what’s all this talk about blood and “In a similar sort of way” what the hell is that suppose to mean? If Eve was made from Adam’s rib, like the Creation Museum is claiming then Adam and Eve would have the same DNA and the same blood type.
The Creation Museum portray Adam and Eve as having black hair and nice tans --- but they aren’t what one could call “middle-brown skin colour.”
Yet the Sistine Chapel at the Vatican shows them with light colored or red hair?
Wouldn’t Pope Julius II and Michelangelo have inside information on what Adam and Eve really looked like? We are talking the Vatican folks --- not some roadside attraction like the Creation Museum.
What did Charlton Heston know since he played both Michelangelo and Moses? And least we forget, Heston presented the Bible in film and book form. Talk about connected.
I guess it is a question of who are you going to believe --- The Vatican, Charlton Heston or the folks at the Creation Museum?
There are other questions that the Creation Museum doesn’t fully address:
What did Charlton Heston know since he played both Michelangelo and Moses? And least we forget, Heston presented the Bible in film and book form. Talk about connected.
I guess it is a question of who are you going to believe --- The Vatican, Charlton Heston or the folks at the Creation Museum?
There are other questions that the Creation Museum doesn’t fully address:
ARE ADAM AND EVE MISSING SOMETHING?
Why aren’t Adam and Eve anatomically correct in the Creation Museum. The Vatican wasn’t ashamed to show Adam and Eve naked. Why is the Creation Museum?
  PROOF that Adam had his short comings |
ADAM WAS A PORN STAR? IS 'ADAM'S'' FRIEND A TRANNY?
Shortly after the CREATION MUSEUM opened word got out that the person who posed for Adam is an actor/stuntman named Eric Linden.
News has it that, Mr. Linden performed on and owned a web site named www.bedroomacrobat.com. The web site has been taken down so we have no way to confirm. |
In spite of the fact that Adam was ill eqipped to be the Father of Mankind, the truth remains that he and Eve spawned Cain and Abel. To be fair, we really can't discuss Cain without talking about the now infamous Mrs. Cain.
